Friday, February 18, 2011

chemo cycle 8 number one

Going to chemo....eight months now on this chemo...feeling mixed emotions...not knowing if it's working or if I'm just going...

One thing I've learned over the years...is to trust the path...trust what is placed before me as opportunities to learn and to grow...especially when it's so painful and uncertain...so it really doesn't matter....all experiences are just that....it's not judging this vs. that....one woman's poison is another woman's  pleasure...it's really all in the perception...this is natural...this is not....it really doesn't matter at some point....just allowing the experiences to deepen me...it's happening this way naturally....even with unnatural poison....it's not what my intuitive self as an organic girl would choose...or would she???? It's really about embracing the experiences...I have made mostly natural medicine choices my entire life...with the exception of some really serious disease challenges...the natural choices didn't work...I could have given up then to the cycle of life and just let go....I did for a while and I found myself close to death....I'm not ready....I'll say it better...I'm ready if and when it's truly my time....it doesn't feel like that to me...I have so much to share...so much teaching and love to share...I'm just stepping into my time to feel life's wisdom bubbling up inside of me....it's not time yet...and yet....I find myself challenged again...what to do???? My oh my...so many opinions out there...so many judgments....all I can do and say and share is  ... when you are the one faced with these decisions....then you can share your experiences and that will be helpful...until you have really walked in my hiking boots...it's really hard to know for sure..." what would you do?"

I had a very meaningful time with a woman whom I value so much spiritually and energetically ....she welcomes me into her heart and my time with her yesterday was exactly what I needed ...thank you so much...you know who you are....I love you and I value your gifts...her openness with my decisions and my desire to live life in every moment is supported and cherished by her....once again ...thank you!!!

Getting ready to embrace yet another experience....love to you on this beautiful day!!!

To be a warrior is to experience life on our own two feet, without the companionship of habitual patterns.

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